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Looking for girlfriend > Looking for boyfriend > My boyfriend and i are broke

My boyfriend and i are broke

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By Mary Elizabeth Dean. Couples break up for many reasons. Sometimes the reasons are clear, such as frequent arguments, lack of interest, and abuse. Other times, breakups are not so obvious, and that can leave you questioning your decision.

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My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over three years; we're both in our mids. We're in love, we're pretty much best friends, and we both see this relationship moving toward marriage. But there is a thorn. Months ago, we moved into a one-bedroom apartment we'd been living together before, but with roommates. The apartment is expensive and has put a financial strain on both of us. I have a better job than my partner so I pay more than half of the rent. But I also pay all the bills and for most of our meals.

My boyfriend pays for things when he can afford it, but that's a small fraction. I have started to work overtime and even considered getting a second job to make ends meet, but I don't see him making the same effort. He seems content to be taken care of. We fight about this topic every few weeks, and sometimes he says he'll make more of an effort to help though nothing significant has come from those promises.

But sometimes he tries to make me the bad guy for being volatile and causing fights. I can't help but get upset when I'm going broke trying to keep us afloat and he's taking days off and playing video games with his friends. I want to stay with him. I want him to help more with expenses but I don't know if he will ever step up to the plate. I don't want our relationship to end because of finances. I'm not sure where to go from here. It sounds like this apartment was unaffordable from the start.

For that reason, you might want to consider undoing the decision to move. Is it possible to break the lease and find a place that works for your budget? Maybe that means moving to a more remote area, having less space, or finding roommates again, but that's the lifestyle you can pay for right now. It's also the one that'll make you and you boyfriend more relaxed as a couple.

As you plan your next steps, you do need to have a talk with your boyfriend about why he wanted to move, his hopes for the future, and how he likes to spend money. If his priorities are different than yours — if it was you who wanted to move, and he would have been happy staying with roommates and video games — you should think about whether you're with the right partner.

Please know that money is the thing that kills a lot of relationships. Ask your boyfriend what he wants life to look like in five years and how he expects the two of you to get there. Think about whether you can live with his answer. Previous Letter Monday January 8, Share Tweet Tumbl. Hi Meredith, My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over three years; we're both in our mids.

Is this a reason to break up? Featured Comment "Oh, I had a husband like this. Key word: HAD" — urkiddinme. Loading Comments Want Meredith's Advice? Submit a letter. Reader Favorites. All Fields Are Required. Don't have an account? Register at Boston.

My Boyfriend Broke Up With Me And It Was The Best Damn Thing To Ever Happen To Me

Well, not for the first week or so. I was devastated and my heart was torn to pieces, like what most breakups would do to a person. All my hopes and dreams of having a future with the guy I loved and adored the most was gone, just like that. Then the next day I had to go back home.

I make my living flying around the world, talking to women about how to take control of their money so they can afford their dream life. But after six months of dating heaven, you discover a problem — his financial situation sucks. His checking account is constantly overdrawn, his five-figure credit card debt is accruing interest at an alarming rate, and his retirement account is a whopping zero dollars.

Money problems trigger arguments. Money worries are so damn draining. They suck up your soul, your energy, and even your happiness. When my partner and I suddenly found ourselves struggling to make ends meet, stress consumed me day and night. I was always irritated and hostile, especially with him.

"How I Recognized (and Left) a Financially Abusive Relationship"

I remember the first time my then-boyfriend asked me for money and I didn't feel like I could say no. We were parked in the lot of a train station where he often picked me up. Since he'd recently quit a job he hated and was only working part-time, he needed extra cash for gas to keep picking me up and visiting me, he said. Nobody other than a cab driver had ever asked me to compensate them for a ride, and the exchange felt oddly transactional for two people who had been dating for a year and a half. Plus, I paid for my own train tickets, which I thought made us even. But it didn't stop there. Every time we went out, some unforeseeable circumstance seemed to leave him broke.

‘I’m going broke trying to keep us afloat’

By Chris Seiter. Typically, there are three outcomes to a break up, you can initiate the break, he can end it or you can both agree that you need to go your separate ways. This page is going to focus solely on the women who initiated the break up. So, the ideal person for this page would be a woman who wants to get her boyfriend back after breaking up with him. Or, you might just be considering the prospect, still unsure if your ex boyfriend is worth the trouble.

We shared a two-bedroom apartment together with our two dogs and had unofficially but mutually agreed to share our lives together. Only, I was unhappy.

I broke up with my boyfriend of a year a few weeks ago. He is such a great guy and he was so wonderful to me but I just felt that something was missing. I gave it time and had been wrestling with myself over this for several months. Breaking up with him was the hardest thing I have ever done and he is devastated.

Love Or Money? 5 Things To Ponder Before You Dump Your Broke Man

Yes, we are imperfect creatures, yes, it is maybe a bit hypocritical, but it is human. So before I continue to spoil the question and the answer! And he grew up essentially on a hippie commune, so for him, this lifestyle has always been the norm and the expectation.

When my then-boyfriend ended our relationship, I never expected him to say it was because I was too poor. There are many reasons he could have given for breaking up: The spark was gone. He was no longer attracted to me. My habit of singing Muppet songs in the shower is indisputably weird. Modern relationships have a great deal to do with what economists call "consumption compatibilities".

I Broke Up With My Boyfriend After Four Years And A Year Later He Became The Love Of My Life

My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over three years; we're both in our mids. We're in love, we're pretty much best friends, and we both see this relationship moving toward marriage. But there is a thorn. Months ago, we moved into a one-bedroom apartment we'd been living together before, but with roommates. The apartment is expensive and has put a financial strain on both of us. I have a better job than my partner so I pay more than half of the rent.

I broke up with my boyfriend of a year a few weeks ago. He is such a great guy and he was so wonderful to me but I just felt that something was missing. I would.

Tired of paying for everything? Learn how to save your money and your relationship. Of course, his lack of income might not be the only reason for the sudden breakdown in her commitment level, but clearly money was causing tension in their relationship and they were on the fast track to a terrible breakup.

What being dumped over money taught me about love

Dear Polly,. My ex made a lot of money, but everyone around us was stressed out and competitive and kind of a total jerk. I never felt at home.

I Broke Up With My Boyfriend But Question My Decision

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Comments: 2
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  2. Vinris

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